Manage Your Expectations and Prepare for Challenging Family Interactions
Are you feeling the pressure of the holiday season? You’re not alone. The holidays aren’t always as happy and perfect as movies and commercials make them seem. In my workshops across the country, many people share that they have mixed emotions or feel anxious before family gatherings. Some even dread spending time with extended family, especially when past hurts haven’t been acknowledged. It’s completely understandable to feel this way, and you’re not the only one navigating these complicated emotions.
Reduce Holiday Stress by Creating a Plan for Stressful Family Gatherings
In this month’s Substack article, I write about holiday stress and share practical tips you can start doing now to help you and your family navigate the challenges of family gatherings with more confidence and peace this holiday season.
But don’t wait—start planning now with your family for how to handle challenging get-togethers. For example, consider creating a code word or hand signal to use when someone feels overwhelmed and needs a break. Take time to identify which family members tend to trigger you most and how their behavior usually makes you feel. Recognizing these triggers ahead of time can help you maintain emotional distance in the moment and avoid reacting impulsively. Finally, prepare direct responses to set boundaries with difficult relatives. Check out my Substack article for more helpful examples.
I also include a Vagal System Nurturing exercise to help you regain composure and stay centered in the moment. The vagus nerve is a vital part of the body’s stress response, playing a key role in mood regulation and overall well-being. You can calm and relax the vagus nerve by practicing breathing exercises that slow your heart rate and help your body relax. The simple, 60-second exercise is perfect to use before family events and to reduce holiday stress. You can also try it during a family gathering—just slip away to the bathroom—or (if you aren’t the one driving!) practice it in the car on your way home.
Thank you to everyone who has supported my work and continues to do so—I’m so grateful to be able to share my ideas with you. I truly believe in your ability to create a life filled with joy, understanding, and peace. May this season bring you everything you need to nurture your heart and soul.
Yours,
Donna
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Breaking Free From Trauma is a gentle yet in-depth guided 3-hour course to transform the lasting impact of traumatic experiences, based on cutting-edge neuroscience.
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